Path to the Cross
I suppose if I am going to ask you to follow my journey, I
should let you in on a little about me. What makes me, me! For people that do
know me, it is no secret that my Faith comes first. But what is unknown to
many, is the path I have taken to get me where I am now. This is a personal
side of me, so I ask this be a judge free zone! :o)
Based on how much I rely
on my faith and how strongly I value it, you would think I grew up in the
church and this has been my way of life always. Wrong. I did not grow up with
God as the focal point in my life. Uncomfortable,
embarrassed, ashamed, are a few emotions that I felt growing up. I remember those moments being around friends
speaking of His word and me having no idea what they were talking about. I knew His name, but that is it. Being really
shy (I know, me shy? Things have changed!) and already intimidated by my lack
of knowledge I never asked to go to church or learn. It wasn’t until I met an
amazing girl that will forever be one of my best friends. It was freshman year
of high school and she asked the terrifying question, “Do you want to go to
church with me?!” Anyone that is new to the church, at any age, has that
uncomfortable feeling when it’s their first time attending. It’s intimidating.
When I built up the courage to go, I was glad I did. I remember everyone being
very welcoming and cheerful and without knowing the significance it would later
have on my life, I knew it felt right. I promise this is not an attempt to
press any certain views on anyone, but I do believe you learn so many morals of
becoming a well rounded, kind hearted person through His word.
Testimony: One
common challenge you go through during your teenage years is peer pressure and
that want of being “cool” and included. For those that knew me in high school,
know I wasn’t the “party girl.” I preferred having sleepovers making silly
videos and eating junk food than going to parties and drinking. As this does
sound like the correct choice to make, I found myself wondering why I was the
different one. I had no desire to drink and that didn’t make me fit in with the
crowd. One night I decided to go with one my friends to a party. I wanted to
know what it was like. I wanted to be a “normal” high school student. I was
pumped up and dressed up super cute. I got to the party, had someone make me a
drink, took one sip, and put the cup down. It just wasn’t for me. And that
night I learned it was all right. It’s just fine being different.
Through out high school I continued to attend church and
grow a relationship with God. My senior year of high school, my best friend that
I always went with moved away. Instead of continuing on my own, I stopped going
to church and lost connection with Him. I knew Him enough to reach out when I
was going through tough times. I was the occasional prayer and eventually fell
off the path. I can’t say I turned into this sinful horrible person, but I wasn’t
living a Godly life.
Some people say there is a moment in life that makes you
either start your relationship with God or find your way back. Mine started in
October 2009. I was a full time student at Texas
State working on my dance and
education degree and dancing for the Austin Toros basketball team. Life was
good and busy! I was constantly using my body and working it in over time. I
was a work out junky, so being sore and having muscle cramping was the norm and
did not make me think twice. I remember complaining about being unusually sore
and uncomfortable during work outs and practice, but just pushed through it. It
wasn’t until one morning I woke up in bed and couldn’t lift my arms off my bed.
My legs were stiff and I was in complete intense pain. I couldn’t get up to get
my mom so I just remember screaming to get attention. I was quickly in the car
on my way to the ER. This is where I would be for the next 4 months on and off.
After I checked in and did the normal check up routine and blood work, the
nurse came out and told me the different possibilities this could be. The
options ranged from least serious, dehydration, to most serious, a condition called
Rhabdomyolysis,
which we were informed could be fatal at worst case scenario. Patiently waiting, with my mind set on that I just need to drink more water, the nurse came
out saying I am going to be set up in a room immediately. My heart sunk and I was
scared. The doctor informed me that I had an outbreak of rhabdo and it has
spread into my blood stream and liver. The next 3 months involed trips to the
hospital, mulitple tests, patience, and most importantly, prayer. There were
some mornings I couldn’t get out of bed because my legs wouldn’t bend at the
knee. Rhabdo causes paralysis, the feeling of being paralyzed but it is not
permanent. As you probably concluded, any form of physical fitness or dancing
was not allowed. I had to drop 2 of my classes that semester and I had to give
up my spot on the dance team. At one point, the doctor told me to consider a
different career path because he wasn’t sure if my muscles would heal back
properly. My liver counts got progressively worse before anything got better. With
nothing else to rely on, I turned to God.
As terrifying and negative as this experience was, it brought positive
into my life. It gave me a new outlook. I promised myself I would never take
for granted the blessing God gave me to dance. Before this experience, there
were mornings I would wake up and complain about going to class, having to
practice, and days I would do everything half way. Now I know I am blessed to
have this body with the ability to move, this talent that God trusted me with
to share. Most importantly, this sparked the relationship with God that I
needed back. I said the typical prayer “God if you just get me through this, I promise I’ll stay
with you always.” I have kept that promise.
Much Love and God Bless,
Lisa
